Eric- May 10, 2020
Many married women face the dilemma of having a third person in their marriage, thanks to a record number of committed men seeking for emotional relationships outside of their legal matrimonies. But, this also raises the question of why these numbers seem to be climbing higher as time goes by. And what can these lost women do to try and save their marriages already on the rocks?
Why Men Have Affairs?
The first thing to tackle in such a sensitive situation is to understand why men tend to have affairs, even when they seem happily married. One of the mainly cited reasons is the sense of boredom in the marriage. It is only human nature to eventually lose interest in something that feels like a routine. If couples fail to inject some spice into their matrimonial life, fatigue will be quick to set in between the pair.
In addition to boredom, they may also feel a sense of being unappreciated. Most wives become preoccupied with the chores of the home as well as with caring for the children. Given that modern wives also have the responsibility of maintaining a career outside the home, they may unknowingly overlook the needs of their husbands.
Another reason is the inherent addiction to sexual relations in some individuals. This is a medical infliction and can be managed with the proper administration of therapeutic drugs. But, in most cases, men tend to feel shy too reach out for help for this condition and instead take the easy way out by having affairs with multiple women.
However, another common reason would be to take revenge. Many a times we’ve heard stories of cheating couples, be it man or wife. Lots of men tend to walk on the road to affairs just to get even with a partner who has been unfaithful. Even men who suspect their wives of having another man will tend to quickly find solace in the hands of another woman.
What are the Signs of a Cheating Husband?
There are many ways of catching a cheating husband. All that women need to do is to look closely at the subtle signs that can help point to your man having a woman other than you. Sometimes, these hints may be even more obvious than expected so let’s take a closer look to see what they are.
The first and most glaring sign would be that your man will begin to distance himself from you, and even your family. Your sex life will also take quite a hit as men tend to ignore their partners whenever their sexual needs are being fulfilled someplace else. Men usually release their pent up sexual tensions through an affair or a heavy reliance on pornography and service of sex workers.
Increasingly Secretive Behavior
Obviously, someone with something to hide will most likely become more secretive about even the most trivial things. The most obvious would be being extremely reticent about their mobile phone. You will notice that your man now has a new habit of receiving calls far from your range of hearing. They may also be very touchy about people who have access to their emails and personal computers. If your man begins to display such signs, it may be wise to run a quick check to see who they’ve been in contact with.
Long Periods Away From Home
Men who are cheating also have a recurring pattern of long-distance travels. It is common for most men to have affairs in a different state or a different region, to reduce the chances of getting caught with their side piece. If your man, who rarely traveled away for business, begins to exhibit a repetitive tendency of long periods of travel to foreign states, you may have a reason to worry about a third wheel in your marriage.
Secret Social Media Accounts
Another tell-tale sign is having more than one secret social media accounts. In this day and age, most families stay connected with each other via the many social media networks that have been made available today. Hence, it becomes increasingly difficult for men to maintain contact with a woman that they are having an affair with via existing social media accounts. These secret accounts are usually specifically created to fish for new women and reach out to them. If you happen to stumble upon one of those, the accounts themselves would usually be enough evidence of a cheating husband.
How to Save Your Relationship?
Studies have shown that over 20% of men aged above 55 have extramarital relationships as opposed to the 14% of those below 55 years of age. From these numbers, it can be deduced that affairs affect couples that have been married for some time. And in such relationships, it is only natural that one or both spouses may want to attempt to save what is left of their long-standing matrimonial alliance.
The best way is for both partners to discuss the matter amicably and talk about any reservations they may have. It is also best to speak about any feelings of underappreciation or any other negative sentiments that may have been suppressed by both parties. Speaking about the problem makes it easier for couples to identify weak points in their marriage, in order to begin working on them.
Another important thing in trying to save your affair-stricken marriage is compromisation. Compromise is the key to keeping a marital union harmonious and happy. Different partners will have different needs and when they are not fulfilled, they would seek them from places outside the marriage, which is detrimental to both partners.
If you’re at wit’s end on what to do, a marriage counselor would be able to help you sort out this tangled mess of an extramarital relationship in your marriage. Having a mediator to manage your feelings as well as your partner’s sentiments will highly likely result in a more effective discussion, instead of full-on fights like with most couples. This can help to mend the relationship instead of having to resort to an eventual split.
A cheating husband cheats mostly because there is something that remains unfulfilled, be it physically or emotionally. As wives, it would be best to always be privy to any subtle changes in your partner’s demeanor in order to pinpoint any marital problems that may be hiding there. Doing so can drastically reduce the chances of your man cheating on you and lets you keep your marriage happy and healthy.