Vintage sex? Is this the old-time fap material that my parents jerked off to in the 60’s, 70’s, 80’s and 90’s?

Correct, mofo! Welcome to our vintage porn category, the golden age of porno, an old-school place where you will see the best classic porn tubes and websites in this XXX niche online. Those natural big titties, pics of juicy big asses, hairy pussy pictures, the stockings, the joy of interracial lesbian scenes and those epic cheesy lines in hardcore rape taboo movies. Also the naughty roleplay incest stories with a perverted family group sex party between daughter, son, mom and dad will for sure make you understand why I like the classic porno videos in this category so much more than modern XXX clips.

Did you know that the German, French, Italian and Danish porno industry was huge and popular back then? Does anybody remember porn studio Color Climax and their erotic films?

Color Climax? Didn’t they get shut down for producing forbidden pornography?

The “Color Climax” corporation, also known as the “pedo” company, was a Danish pornography producer that was settled in the capital “Copenhagen”. Until the 90’s, it was one of the leading producers of European smut. The company started their business with the publication of a pornographic magazine called “Color Climax” (duh?), although porno was forbidden in Denmark, until 1969. Soon after, it became legalized and they started producing pornographic films too now. Hey, it was the time of the hippies and free love, baby! I guess those nature loving motherfuckers got tired of the damn prudes in the government and started a revolution.

In order to also keep the refugees of that time sexually satisfied, the government came up with a brilliant new law. They decided to legalize the production of juvenile material too! Legend says that Trump’s ancestors originated from Denmark, seeing the genius decision making actions of the leaders of this country in the 70’s. The economy thrived and the word “rapefugees” was delayed to be added to the dictionary. Hey, how the fuck do you think Denmark became such a rich country?

Films with girls, who didn’t reach the age of consent yet, were having orgies with grown-up men and some were even “younger”! Rumors say that these fucked up vids series were selling like hot cupcakes on the black market in the middle east and kept the peace. Conspiracy theorists think that the closure of this company lead to the attack of the sexually frustrated Bin Laden on the twin towers in New York. That terrorist motherfucker was one of the biggest pornography addicts, as later discovered and leaked by the CIA and probably couldn’t handle this injustice.

Even to this day, there are still many (older) fans of classics with legendary titles such as “Family Incest” and “Sucking Daddy”. One of the most popular Danish pornstars of that time was “Tiny Tove”, thanks to her “young” appearance. Most of you sick fucks probably thought she wasn’t legal and fantasized about her being your daughter, but she was 100 % 18+. Shit, I bet you feel dirty now the truth has been exposed and your whole life seems like a lie. Cheer up, bro and don’t commit suicide just yet. President Trump is in charge and great (porno) decisions will make America great again!

Seriously, how the fuck is it possible that this kind of fucked up shit was ever legalized???

I guess girls didn’t know the word “shaved pussy” when I see classic porn movies on these retro tubes?

Yep, you’re right! It was the hairy pussy galore era! Back in those ancient days, it was fashionable for not only Japanese and Asian girls to have a big bush between their legs. Also, you are free to not like what I am about to say, but I don’t care! Famous models, actresses and timeless pornstars from the old days are way more hot than the ones today. Well, not anymore, because those young teens turned into MILFs and grannies. Watching mature beauties like Brigitte Lahaie, Christy Canyon (I used to date her), Ginger Lynn, Nina Hartley, Traci Lords, Annette Haven, Marilyn Jess, Candy Samples, Vanessa Del Rio or others, will always make my heart wild and my mind dirty.

I should say that, besides me, Ron Jeremy probably fucked all of them anal, creampied their pussies and gave them a facial cumshot. Ron is probably like the Chuck Norris of the adult industry with the number of women that he fucked in his career! He’s the hero that everybody looked up to and was jealous about. How did this antique legend keep his cock hard, when viagra wasn’t even invented??? And bareback coition, you say? That’s right! You rarely would see a condom in an orgy scene, because AIDS was probably too afraid to show up with Ronny fucking around!

Link: YouTube (Ron Jeremy trolling Miley Cyrus’ “Wrecking Ball”. WARNING! Prepare yourself for multiple orgasms, ladies!)

PornDude, are you sure that I won’t lose my erection when I watch these retro sex videos?

A hole is a hole, motherfucker and if you’re straight, your dick will go up, if you see one, whether it has hair on it or not! If by any chance you are younger than me (which you are, because I am as old as time and immortal) and you have never seen a full-length retro porn movie on a VHS or Betamax tape, try out this list of free tube sites for a few days and see why I like to call those classic sex movies, oldies but goldies from the 60s, 70s, 80s and 90s era. Consider it as a lesson in the history of pornography!

Where are the days, when I used to jerk off on the toilet using my brother’s socks, my sister’s Nivea cream as lube and my mother’s lingerie magazine as masturbation material? We would share our father’s playboy or penthouse magazine at school with our friends. These nude babes were our first experience with a pussy, our sex education and basically took our virginity and innocence! For those of you that know what I’m talking about, let’s all cum tribute to the amazing girls that started it all! Oh, cheating aunt Kay Parker and private teacher Jenna Jameson, I miss you!